She means!

She means!

Her shy smile comes to mind. Her charming laughter is music to the ears. Her long hair sways in the breeze, bringing joy to the heart. She isn’t exceptionally beautiful — dusky skin, an average height, and far from resembling a poetic muse. Yet, there’s something about her that brings him a sense of happiness and calm. He’s always looking for a chance to talk to her.

Whenever she sees him, her smile lights up his heart, though he doesn’t let it show. He keeps their conversation focused on work, maintaining a serious demeanor. But as she explains something, he finds himself gazing at her. She notices his interest in her but doesn’t let it bother her. She adjusts her outfit — whether it’s a saree, salwar, or just a T-shirt — even when there’s nothing much to fix. Pulling her shirt down or adjusting her scarf, she seems to do it unconsciously.

She never gets annoyed with him. As they talk, their words seem secondary to the comfort of each other’s presence. Even when the conversation ends, he tries to prolong it by bringing up a new topic, and she does the same, wanting him to stay just a little longer. They discuss work-related things, which are heard by others nearby, but since it’s all office talk, no one minds. Their conversation might be about mundane topics, but for them, it’s the connection that matters most.

Though she is not beautiful, she appears attractive to him. He admires her intelligence, her dedication to her work, and her meticulous nature. She completes tasks, no matter how challenging, effortlessly and quickly. He believes that a woman's intelligence is far more attractive than her beauty.

Beauty-induced love doesn’t last long, but relationships endure because of personality, he feels. While beauty fades, intelligence and personality endure, he tells his friends. Even when friends argue that overly intellectual people in love tend to display more intellect than love, he insists that personality matters along with intelligence.

Shreshta and Mohan work in a Bengaluru office. Though in different departments, they sit near each other. Initially, when Mohan saw Shreshta, he wasn’t drawn to her. She wasn’t someone who would instantly attract attention with her looks. However, as he conversed and worked with her, he became acquainted with her extraordinary intelligence, which captivated his heart. Gradually, he began to enjoy spending more time with her. Since their jobs often required collaboration, they spent considerable time together during the day. Without realizing it, he was drawn to her.

They know both are married. They never discussed personal matters, went out together, or called each other outside work. Their conversations were limited to work, and yet, something unsaid connected them.

Mohan deeply loved his wife, Ananya. They had been married for three years but didn’t have children yet. Ananya managed all household chores meticulously and supported him in every way. Despite her efforts to ensure he had no additional responsibilities at home, Mohan still helped with chores.

Ananya was his relief from the pressures of work; hugging her gave him immense comfort.

Despite his love for his wife, Shreshta began occupying Mohan’s thoughts more often. He started yearning to see her at work and talk to her, though he never wished to take it beyond that. When overwhelmed by work or frustration, speaking with Shreshta brought him peace and calm. But when her memory started surfacing even at home, Mohan grew alarmed. One night, he woke up startled after dreaming of her gently caressing his cheek. This isn’t right, he thought, especially when he had a beautiful, loving wife. Mohan knew he would never betray his wife or seek another woman’s company.

To resolve his inner conflict, Mohan decided to avoid Shreshta as much as possible. He started communicating through emails or phone calls instead of meeting her in person. He limited conversations to a polite “hi” when they crossed paths. Sensing his avoidance, Shreshta also refrained from talking much. Yet, their paths would cross during meetings, forcing them to interact.

A peculiar situation began to unfold—they unknowingly started wearing clothes of the same color. This coincidence lasted for about 15 days. Colleagues even teased them with “same pinch” remarks, but neither paid much attention. To break the pattern, Mohan deliberately avoided wearing shirts he initially picked, choosing something else instead. Yet, the next day, Shreshta wore the same color he had avoided. The coincidence unnerved him.

Despite his efforts, Shreshta’s presence lingered in his thoughts. Hearing her voice from afar at the office cheered him up. He rationalized that admiring her intelligence wasn’t wrong and believed he wasn’t betraying his wife, as his feelings were confined to his thoughts.

When Ananya left for her parents’ home in Mysore, Mohan felt an emptiness in their home. That evening, while going to bed, he noticed her diary on the bed. Though he knew it was wrong to read someone’s diary, curiosity got the better of him. Flipping through the pages, he found an entry written two months ago that piqued his interest.

The diary read: “I don’t love him, but there’s something about him that attracts me. Spending time with him feels good. He speaks so beautifully and explains everything so clearly. I’ve learned a lot from him.”

Hey, both of us wore the same color clothes to the office today, didn’t we? Is there something like telepathy? He goes to the office early, and I go later. He’s not someone who deliberately finds out and dresses like that. He’s proud of me; he admires my intelligence. Surely, when he sees me, he may not feel love, but perhaps he likes me. I’m scared, thinking about what if this liking takes a different form.

"Today, I felt like wearing a saree as it is, so I dressed in one and went to the office. It seemed like he was glancing at me now and then. When he came closer, I felt like I saw a spark in his eyes. Yes, I looked beautiful today. This morning, my husband showered me with warm affection, and I had to get ready again."

"I like Mohan a lot, and he loves me dearly. My mind must not wander elsewhere. I need to free myself from this attraction and find a way to do so, but I don't know what that way is. What if I suddenly tied a rakhi a sister band to him? What would he think? It seems overly dramatic. Is it possible to view someone from a new perspective after seeing them in a different light? Isn’t it a form of self-betrayal to consider a beloved as a brother or a friend? Why not? Just like a caterpillar transforms into a butterfly, can one’s feelings for a person transform? If they do, what are the consequences? If transformed, how does one suppress those feelings? How does one train the mind to write new emotions over the old ones?"

"Or, even if certain feelings arise, is it wrong to set boundaries, enjoy the happiness within those limits, and move on without crossing the line? If one experiences the moment fully and leaves it there, without revisiting it, isn’t that okay? Living in the present—what’s wrong with that?

"Such confusion! Talking to Mohan is another matter; he’s so innocent. He wouldn’t even glance at another woman besides me. He wouldn’t think much about all this. Even if I tell him, he would probably just say, ‘Do whatever you think is right.’"

"Let it be. A solution will surely present itself."

The page ended there. Slowly, he put all the pages in order and placed the diary back where it belonged.

The entry continued, reflecting Shreshta’s thoughts about Mohan. It mentioned coincidences with matching attire and her unease about her feelings. She expressed her intention to suppress these emotions to stay faithful to her husband, whom she loved deeply.

Reading this, Mohan was overwhelmed by guilt and love for his wife. He realized they were navigating the same inner struggle. When Ananya returned, she noticed her diary untouched in its place and assumed Mohan hadn’t read it. Yet, she wished he had, as it might have prompted a conversation.

Here, Mohan, though acting naturally, was anxious about the possibility of Ananya finding out that he had read her diary. He knew that women quickly notice changes in their partner's behavior, emotional fluctuations, and secrets. This was why he could never surprise her. Even if he tried to surprise her with a flower on her birthday or Valentine's Day, she would already know. So, he would openly tell her about any gift he was bringing. If it were jewelry, he would take her along to pick it out.

Though Mohan and Ananya didn’t openly discuss it, everything at their workplace continued as usual. Ananya wished to go to the office without over-decorating herself, while Mohan secretly hoped that he would not cross paths with Shreshta or hear her voice.

When a problem isn’t resolved quickly, one must adapt to it or find a way to push it away. Neither of them knew how to get rid of their problem. Mohan could sense the turmoil in Ananya’s mind, but he remained silent. They both constantly tried to act naturally. They would sit close, watch TV, and occasionally exchange kisses. During such happy moments, Mohan noticed that Shreshta didn’t come to mind, and he made conscious efforts to forget her at home. However, it wasn’t so easy, as he couldn’t avoid her entirely at work. Sometimes, they would naturally talk for long periods, which brought him joy.

That Friday, there was a meeting. A discussion on some topic escalated into an argument. Mohan was presenting his stance, convinced that he was correct. Others were also putting forward their points, including Shreshta, who had a differing opinion. Frustrated, Mohan raised his voice and emphasized his point.

Shreshta turned to him and said angrily,

"Hey, just sit down and watch! Don’t come here trying to show off your intelligence or smartness. I’ve been observing you for years. You act as if you’re the only intelligent one here. I know everything!"

Mohan’s head felt heavy. He knew he was right, and many others in the room also knew it, but the girl he liked had humiliated him publicly. It made him question everything he thought he knew. To her, he was just another colleague, not someone special. What he thought he knew about her was either a delusion or his imagination.

At that moment, he felt both sadness and joy. He was upset for holding her in such high regard but also relieved that he understood her mindset. Now, he felt he wouldn’t even think of her again. More than sadness, he felt relief, and his face lit up with happiness. Everyone was surprised to see him happy instead of angry at Shreshta’s outburst. Smiling, he said, "Do whatever you think is right," and walked out of the room.

He was amazed at how easily a significant problem in his life had resolved itself. He thought, The only woman in my life is my wife, Ananya. She is my everything. How foolish I was to think about this indecent woman. Though it was only halfway through the day, he left the office and went home.

No relationship can withstand humiliation. The humiliation doesn’t have to be significant—a small disregard can sever bonds. Even a slight disrespect, especially from someone we love, can have profound effects. At times, humiliations and anger teach life lessons. Divorce between couples often begins with some small incident. Relationships close enough to share their bodies can fall apart over a single word, turning into hatred—it’s incomprehensible.

When Mohan reached home, Ananya was sitting and reading a book.

Surprised, he asked, "You’re home so early?"

She replied, "I felt happy for some reason, so I came home." She got up and hugged him, and in that embrace, Mohan felt like he had reached heaven.

"Go change your clothes, and I’ll make you some nice tea," she said.

When Mohan went to the bedroom to change, Ananya’s diary lay open on the bed. Glancing at it, he saw something written:

"It’s good that he humiliated me. It feels like a big problem has been resolved."

Mohan thought to himself, Life is such a coincidence. His heart felt at peace.